We know what Anorexia looks like, right? A 5'4" woman, weighing 80 pounds
will stand in front of a mirror gazing at her image and will see FAT!
To her eyes, as she stands in front of the mirror, examining every inch
of her body, her body weighs 250 pounds.
Anyone else; ANYONE ELSE sees the reality of her weight which is 80 lbs. Her skeleton is clearly observed below the skin surface, which has such little mass, that to the objective observer, this woman appears malnourished and maybe even close to dying.
The only conclusion that can be drawn is that this woman is seeing a distorted image of her body that no one else, I mean NO ONE ELSE sees.
And that's her illness!
The cure, if there is ever is one, is several weeks in an institution where the "patient" is taught to rely on and perhaps even trust what OTHERS are seeing, and not his/her own reflection in a mirror.
Once the patient is helped to understand that his/her view of their body is not real, but a distorted mental image, (sort of what we look like when we see ourselves in one of those "Fun House" mirrors at the amusement park), then the patient starts to see him/herself through more objective eyes, and ultimately see the truth of the matter...the truth that he or she has not been able to see...
that she weighs 80 lbs., not 250.
Well, how does this relate to what I call "Vocal Anorexia"?
It's simply this:
"Vocal Anorexia" is a condition where a singer will hear the sounds that
emit when he/she sings a song that NO ONE ELSE hears.
Take the case of the people who audition for American Idol. They will sing...
badly...excruciatingly awful.
Simon will say, "Do you think that was good?", and they will reply, "Yes! I was great!" However, to
everyone else, judges and viewers alike, they were about as terrible as they could be.
What's going on? The person is hearing something that is not real; sounds that objective listeners hear as unpleasant and even painful to hear.
And I know this because I've had students like this in my studio, and believe me, they CANNOT hear how bad they sound. They remain under an illusion that they sound great...a false illusion!
The only person who does not hear how bad it is, is the person singing. And that's an illness. It takes hours, months, maybe even years of ear training for a person with this affliction to improve their singing. Some will discover that what they believed to be a passion was a temporary whim, much like passing a store window and seeing an outfit and thinking to oneself, 'Oh, I gotta have THAT!',only to have it replaced by another "want" a few days later.
The pitch-challenged singer with a real desire to sing will do the work no matter how long it takes, and perhaps end up in the chorus of a Broadway show, or get good enough to perform at the local Karaoke club for friends and family.
Tone Deafness, for the most part, is often "fixable" with commitment and hard work. Less than 1% of the planet's population is truly tone deaf. The others just have something called "lazy ear".
But that's another article altogether. Back to "Vocal Anorexia".
There's a rather curious aspect of vocal anorexia that, to me, is much more intriguing, to say the least.
I have encountered numerous singers who will sing a song, and sound exquisite, simply wonderful. The vocal tone, the expression of the lyric, the entire performance could make one melt,
but to the singer's ear, it sounds frightfully horrendous.
If this singer is told how wonderful he/she sounds, it translates in the singer's brain as, "They're just being nice", or "They didn't hear all the mistakes, so they don't know".
The same inability of the anorexic patient to SEE what is plain as day to an objective eye is apparent
here as the anorexic singer cannot HEAR what is clearly beautiful to the objective listener.
And the solution to this "affliction", is the same. Since it's not a HEARING issue, but a mental one, the anorexic singer needs to learn how to hear him/herself through others ears and not his/her own.
This takes discipline and a continuous inner conversation where the singer must repeat often, "What I am hearing is not real. I will not judge my singing or rely on my own listening for it is flawed by my condition."
This is what Martha Graham was saying to her student, Agnes DeMille in a letter she wrote as a response to Miss DeMille's self-criticism of her work.
Agnes DeMille, for those of you who do not know, was the choreographer for the first Broadway production of "Oklahoma".
She became so critical of her own work that she almost quit, but instead wrote to her mentor, Martha Graham, for some advice.
And this is an excerpt of the note she got back. I strongly recommend that you read it SLOWLY, making sure you understand every word, especially if you feel that you may be one of those who suffer from vocal anorexia.
There is a vitality, a life force, a quickening that is translated
through you into action, and there is only one of you in all time.
This expression is unique, and if you block it, it will never exist
through any other medium; and be lost. The world will not have it.
It is not your business to determine how good it is, not how it
compares with other expression. It is your business to keep it yours
clearly and directly, to keep the channel open.
You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work.
You have only to keep open and aware directly to the urges that motivate you.
Keep the channel open.
No artist is pleased. There is no satisfaction whatever at any time.
There is only a queer, divine dissatisfaction, a blessed unrest that
keeps us marching and makes us more alive than the others.
Chrys Page is a singer, vocal coach, and eBook author of "The Art of Singing" Series, a set of "how-to's" for serious and committed singers.
Chrys provides singers worldwide with a variety of products and services geared to motivate, inspire, and help them on their vocal path wherever it may lead.
http://www.singyourlife.com has been serving singers for 8 years with online lessons, backing tracks, sheet music, and a monthly newsletter filled with timely tips and advice for singers.
We invite you to Join Our Mailing list! It's FREE!
Her latest website, http://www.Karaoke-And-Beyond.com is exclusively for singers who wish to take their singing to another level, which is singing to "live" music. At this site, the singer finds Keyboard and Guitar Lessons, and a variety of self-help music books designed to help singers learn how to accompany themselves when they sing. The "Art of Singing" series is also offered, along with great deals on musical instruments through an affiliate link.
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